02/03/06 :: Marriage, meet grace
Gaithersburg, MD >> Gary and Betsy Ricucci just finished the second edition of Love that Lasts: When Marriage Meets Grace, scheduled for release from Crossway Books this spring. Why another book on marriage? Gary took some time to answer this question and more.
Gary Ricucci has been a pastor at Covenant Life Church for almost 29 years. He and his wife, Betsy, have been married since 1977.
Family News: After the book went out of print, what led you to revise it?
Gary: The book needed more of an emphasis on the gospel of Jesus Christ and God’s grace as the foundation for marriage. Only the gospel and grace bring real purpose, power, hope, and change. We also wanted to take more time to explain the biblical “why” of problems and solutions at a heart and sin level, rather than run through a list of “how to” techniques and practices. Finally, we wanted to quote the authors whose works we could confidently recommend because of their invaluable benefit to us.
There are a lot of books out there about marriage. Why publish another one?
Many books on marriage have “how-tos” that are practical and somewhat helpful, but they don’t really explain the “why” of a Christ-centered marriage. They often neglect the very relevance of Christ and the church. And too often they are about how to get, rather than how to give. Many married people are trying to do the right thing, but without a sense of God’s purpose and provision, and with little awareness of what’s going on in their own hearts. Through much help from the Lord and many patient friends, we are learning that outward behavior must be biblically and inwardly motivated by the Word, the Spirit, and the grace of God.
Our desire is to offer a biblical, gospel-centered and grace-motivated approach to marriage that brings genuine hope (which will never come from pursuing marriage for our own happiness). We also want to point readers toward the local church as a means of grace for marriage. Marriage must find its purpose in God, its hope in the gospel, and its home in the local church.
Quite simply, we really do want our readers to find hope for change…hope for a “love that lasts.” But the right question is not “how do I do this?” The right question is “who is this about?” And the answer is God himself.
Who are you hoping will read the new book?
We hope that anyone preparing for marriage, anyone struggling with marriage, or anyone eager to grow in their marriage, will find it helpful. Our intent is that all will equally find hope and help because they are pointed to the grace of God.
How do you hope Love that Lasts will be used?
We’ve included discussion questions at the end to aid in application. Mere information is not transformation. Truth must be applied. I picture the book being read together by couples, by small groups who are building stronger marriages, or by engaged couples in premarital counseling. I think it would make a good gift for engaged couples! But let me be careful to say that this book is not a substitute for the local church or for Scripture. Our intent is that people use it to strengthen their relationship with God, in conjunction with a strong local church.
Photo: Gary and Betsy enjoying Disney World